This Christmas has had many moments far superior than Christmases past. There was no freak out on Christmas day, Mom prepared the entire meal with less than 3 expletives uttered. My family spent TIME together! Not just a few minutes, but a few hours! I've also had time to relax since I've been here, which might be the greatest shocker of them all.
But all of my yuletide bliss is bittersweet and somewhat diluted because of one very important missing piece--Tom. Being away from him has been one of the hardest things I've ever done. As soon as I distract myself enough to forget how much I miss him, I get on Facebook or even open my computer to see the background and I fall back into a Scrooge-worthy bummed out state.
Am I being ridiculous? I know we've only been dating for a month, but he makes me so incredibly happy! He's like the missing puzzle piece in my life. Seemingly every shortcoming I have, he balances. It blows my mind. He motivates me to be better and makes me feel like I can actually do it. I could go on forever, but needless to say he makes my life so wonderful. Being without him has felt like walking around like a zombie. It's like there's a hole in my heart...
So Christmas is supposed to be the happiest time of year, but this year it's been the loneliest. Christmas is when you celebrate all the wonderful things in your life and bask in the happiness of those things... so what about when those things are out of your reach?
"And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes, or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'til his puzzler was sore. The the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more."
